I’ve got some good news about dying.

Rather obviously, how “well” you die will depend a good deal on your circumstances, but here’s the thing: the “wellness” of your dying also depends on the choices you make. Before I tell you why, let me share with you my credentials for writing about this. 

I have been fighting stage 4 cancer for six years. I have come close to death on many occasions. The disease is throughout my torso and I am under palliative care. Yet despite the grim reality of all the medical procedures, the last six years have been the most joyful and fruitful of my life – due entirely to God’s love and the love of others. By God’s grace, I’ve continued to write.  This writing has not been done because of a need to be significant or to be remembered. Rather, it has flowed naturally. In a very real way, cancer has rescued me from myself… and from all things dull and meaningless, focussing me on the things that are important.

Back to “choices.”

Your first choice is whether or not you learn to live for the moment. This means choosing to hear and see beauty wherever you go. Look for it. Remark on it. Savour it. Dwell within it. Don’t settle for mere entertainment and wait to die. See life and be part of it. Over the years, I have schooled myself to say “wow!” often, as I walk in the garden or stroll in the park.

The second vital choice to make is whether or not you choose to forgive and let go of resentment. Put bluntly: your soul will not fly free if it is caged in bitterness. Bitterness is the most toxic emotion to personal wellbeing. So forgive. Fix the broken places before you die. To die in peace is very special.

Your third choice is a really big one: it is whether or not to embrace God. Fundamentally, it all comes down to a gamble, doesn’t it? Atheists believe that the universe came from nothing as a result of nothing, (or they believe the universe has existed eternally without reason or cause). It is a position that presents a challenge rationally. Alternatively, you can see the extraordinary order that exists in the cosmos and conclude that there is a mind behind it all. Is there a God or not? Which way will you bet? 

Its relevance for dying is this: The obscenity and finality of death will be replaced by hope and meaning if God exists. This will be particularly the case if you have a personal relationship with God which you develop through prayer. But a word of caution: I am not advocating the adoption of absurd spiritual beliefs as an analgesic to calm the angst over the finality of death. To do that is simply self-delusion. The issue isn’t whether or not God makes you feel better, the issues with whether or not God is true.

The fact is: if God is true, God is worthy of your full commitment. If God is not, he is worthy of nothing. So… Did God really die on a cross 2,000 years ago to win you back to himself? Check it out. But when you do, do so with humility, for it is only the humble that find truth. Personally, I believe the invitation to seek God hangs there in history and beckons to you from the cosmos.

Your next choice follows on from the last, and it is this: As much as it depends on you, finish your mission on planet Earth. Your mission can be as humble as being a good influence on others. Whatever it is, it will feature compassion and truth. Therefore, find your purpose, and live it fully. But a word of caution is warranted here. The world will always be broken and imperfect, so no one can ever really say that their mission is complete. The real question, therefore, is this: Have you finished as much as you can?

Finally: Choose to be beautiful in character. Simply decide – and stick with your decision. It is as simple (and hard) as that. Choose to be the good person you want to be, for doing so will bring both peace and joy.

And that’s it.

I’ll see you on the other side. Don’t let me down!